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Job Application Psychosis

When Job Hunting Transforms You Into a Philosopher

So… for the last couple of weeks I have been applying to jobs (and careers of course) with the hopes that I would be able to snatch something comfortable and close to home. Everyone wants that perfect place that they actually look forward to going to every day and that their work is not work, but just another thing they love to do…. that’s what I crave. Since I graduated from with my Masters in ’15, I have been in a rut. I have been looking for writing jobs and, of course, as all writers do, I have turned to the internet while using the outlet of a blog.

It’s not that I don’t love writing.

That’s the idea. I adore it. I love writing stories and entertaining the masses, but sometimes it would be nice to just get paid for what you love. That’s the end game to choosing a career path, am I right?

To suddenly be discovered and then BAM, become this literary phenomenon like Stephen King or JK Rowling.

That type of stature takes time and effort, which I’m well aware of, but when does it become apparent that you are a mediocre or fabulous writer? I read a meme a couple of days ago that read, “When is it okay to know that you suck at rapping? Like what age? asking for a friend,” and although I sat at my desk silently chuckling to myself, it turned on a light bulb in my head and it made me realize… everyone who has a dream at one point or another is that person. They are the ones who sit and practice, who try their best to get out there and get noticed.

They go beyond all the odds.

And sometimes…. those are the ones who make it. Those are the ones who become the Leonardo DiCaprios and Charlize Therons of the world. They scratch their way up and reach as far upward as they can. They challenge the sun and apply their tenacity to that mud wall in front of them, edging and climbing, clinging onto each solid piece of sludge until they can finally make it out of the hole.

But that’s the thing…

I don’t want to just climb out of the hole and move on. My goal is to climb and scratch my way out until I reach the top and then I want to turn around and cheer on all those who are still down there. All the ones who were left at the bottom that I couldn’t spare to bring up with me.

I want to be their drive as they make their way up.

Watch them clasp onto the wall and slowly rise into success. I want to celebrate them when they reach the top because it’s a feat that not many can do. I want to recognize their strength as they saw mine. I want to be proud of myself for being their role model, but most of all be proud of them for taking my example. That is something that not all offer once they get out of that hole. Many forget and move on, but that hole is still there… filled with the screams of those dying to get out and make something of themselves. Many of them conform and are complacent with being in that hole while others try day in and day out with no result, their hope being chipped away by doubt and regrets until finally they give up as well. Accepting the fate of the hole.

But anyone can make it out if they truly wish it, if they will it, if they try…

Everyone is sitting down in that hole. You may not be able to climb with them on your back. You may have to leave some behind. But leaving them behind for now isn’t the hardest choice…

It just depends on whether you are willing to be the guide they need to climb out in the future.

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Job Application Psychosis
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