I Quit!

I have been working in my job for a mere 9 months (10 by the time I leave). I tried really hard to stay for at least a year but I just couldn't do it.

I wrote a little about it in 'Nightmare Boss'. I mentioned there that things could be worse. Well, things did get worse and it may take a while for me to get over it.

I Feel Bad

In a way, I feel sorry for my soon-to-be-former employer. She is a dreadful person for whom to work but she is still a person who needs support. She doesn't need as much as she thinks she does.

Recently, she worried about a meeting with, what she felt was, too many people. I understood her concerns there as I had been in a similar position myself. So, in that sort of situation, I do feel for her because I seem to be the only person she trusts.

For the Sake of My Sanity

I had tried to stick it out. I reminded myself that it was well-paid, wasn't too many hours, and I could (usually) take time off when I needed it. The need to remind myself of this became increasingly greater until I got to the point where I decided enough was enough. Not enjoying a job is one thing but when your mental and physical health are suffering, it's time to stop and think.

At the beginning, I made a point of saying that I needed to be back in time to pick up my son from school. This was fine for a while. I then made the mistake of telling the boss that there are two days when I don't pick up my son from school. She seemed to think that this meant I could be at her beck and call all day.

I told her that I needed to have an idea of the time I would finish so that I could make necessary arrangements. She was alright with this for a while and then pushed it further and further. It got to the point where I would take snacks and drinks out with me anyway and she wouldn't tell me how long we would be unless I specifically asked. Even then, I might endure a rant about how she can't possibly know how long she will take to do things.

I Finally Handed In My Notice

There were a few times when I was tempted to quit. I had been looking for other jobs anyway because this was only supposed to be on a casual basis and I needed something permanent, preferably full-time and with set hours. The main reason I stayed was that I didn't want to leave without having something else first.

Well, the boss was aware that I had been looking. She even kept telling me different jobs she thought I could do. So, you wouldn't think it such a surprise when I finally decided to hand in my notice. I found a new job but planned on trying to do both, at least for a while. It got to be too much, however, and it meant a lot of rushing around. This was my opportunity to escape.

A Little White Lie

I don't like telling lies. I'm not very good at it and it is something I find is rarely necessary. Nevertheless, this time, I felt I had a good reason. I thought that telling her that I would be working full-time was a more polite way of resigning than telling her that I can't stand working for her because she is a total pain in the backside. I actually got to the point of being so down and depressed, dreading going to work, and genuinely feeling like crashing into a lorry on the way home was preferable to spending another minute with her. It is quite hard to describe to someone who has not experienced it but there is a reason she doesn't keep employees for long.

New Job

My new job isn't exactly something I really want to be doing but it has set hours, it is term-time only (better than being expected to work more hours over holidays knowing that you have a child, no childcare, and hadn't actually agreed to the extra work).

When I told the boss that I would be leaving, she wanted to know all about it. Up to a point, I don't mind that. Up to a point, it is nice to be interested. I don't even mind her being nosy. What I do mind is when she asked all about the hours I was going to be doing with the intention of telling me that I could still work for her as well. This is why I felt I had to exaggerate the truth a little. Everything I said was met with such things as 'well, you could still work for me' or 'but you'll still help me out'.

I can understand she is concerned that she will have nobody but that is entirely her own fault and, no, I will not still be available because when someone hands in their notice, it generally means that they have no intention of working for you anymore. She could quite easily give people set hours, finish her tasks on time, with some flexibility for appointments, but she would sooner make excuses and take her time while complaining that she can't possibly wait for someone who is five minutes late. The main reason she needs someone to help her is pure laziness and impatience.

The Final Countdown

As I am only working with her on a casual basis, I am under no obligation to give notice at all. However, because I am nice (and I could do with the money), I have given a month's notice. It works out nicely as I finish just before my birthday. I plan on a night out so that will be to celebrate both my birthday and my freedom!

A few things have been going wrong over the past month or so and I really hope that things will start to be better. It's been increasingly difficult to stay positive recently. I feel like we had a lovely year, culminating in a lovely holiday and time with our girls, only to have the world come crashing down as soon as we returned home.

Positive Thinking

Years ago, I decided to turn negatives into positives, to spend more time appreciating the good things. I still do that but it has been very hard lately.

It seemed that nothing was going right. However, I have found a place which will, hopefully, help me find a better job. Quitting the horrible job will mean a lot of good things, including not having to mess around with the times I do things with other people. I was also asked to volunteer as a helper at an IT drop-in so I will be able to do that. Most importantly, of course, it means I can spend time with my family, and my son won't have to guess whether or not I am picking him up from school.

Another thing that has gone right is that my youngest son came home from his theatre school with a certificate for 'Performer of the Week' so that's the positive focus as we fill in an audition application for a TV show. He applied for something else earlier in the year, got an audition but didn't get the part. Still, that was his first application for something beyond local youth theatre so it was really good just to get the audition.

The next few things on my list of positive things will be to have my partner move in with us; go abroad for the first time (well, it will be my and my youngest child's first time); get married. Not necessarily in that order, and it may take a while to complete all three but that is the plan. I find that having a plan helps to stay positive. It is much harder to get stuck in a rut when there are things to which to look forward.