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Finding the Dream

An Abbreviated Version of My College Essay

Me Performing My Self-choreographed Solo at Nationals for the Last Time

I started dancing when I was 8-years-old and never stopped. Each year I added another class or a new competition line until I was enrolled in almost everything offered for my experience level. Through dance I found my passion, which ironically isn't dancing on stage myself, but is choreographing for others. Coming up with new moves and sequences is something that brings a depth of satisfaction to my soul like nothing else can. I will be listening to music and immediately sit-up, eyes full of wild passion, and quickly backtrack the song to rethink what I did in my head as to not lose the abstract movements forever.

I remember finding an old childhood folder. Inside was a piece of paper where 10-year-old me was trying to write down choreography. The writing was nearly impossible to decode and more resembled an alien dialect than my first language, but I think I wanted to be a choreographer before I even knew what it was. Dance has let me discover my life passion, and through dance I am passionate. In my mind, dance and passion are practically synonyms. When I'm dancing for myself alone, I feel alive. The amount of raw energy going through me is incredible. When I'm in the zone, being tired doesn't matter. I become so entirely dedicated to the song that weariness and ability are foreign concepts while I’m in those moments of creating. I’m tearing up right now just thinking about how happy I am when I'm improving.

Dance is important to me because it lets me express myself freely and fully. There is nothing that can't be conveyed through dance and I find that marvelous. I love to go to the studio and improvise for fun. To me, improv is the rawest form of dance that can ever hope to be achieved. When you're young and little, you dance around with no set moves. When you're happy, you jump and shake. When you're in love, you sway back and forth like there's no end. Dance has simply helped me refine my movement; better enabling me to express myself without a single word. Through training I've learned so much about my body and how it can be manipulated. Being exposed to different choreographers has helped me develop my style and find who I am. The more I learn, the better I can express the song I'm dancing to. I hope to learn so much more while studying choreography and dance in college so that my expression can become pinpoint-accurate and meaningful.

While I do not want to dance professionally, I always want to be creating. Creating things is like a drug to me. Nothing beats finishing a project and seeing pieces of yourself floating around in it. My dream is to make grand productions that will reflect who I am and how the song makes me feel. In my dreams I'm sitting in the audience watching the dancers twirl and roll around on stage. Bodies wrapped in costumes that I helped design illuminated by stage lights that I directed. In my fantasy, I've taught them how the song makes me feel and have shown them how to feel it for themselves. Now I can see their passion on stage which was essentially born from me. I hope that the audience will be able to feel the emotion I felt while choreographing the routine. Passion seeping from the dancers and palpable to all whom observe. It's my dream to show everyone how a song moves me and have them truly understand it for themselves in their own reality. I want audience members to leave a performance and feel like they just got off of a roller coaster wrapped in a solar system. That is why I'm passionate about dance and why it is so undyingly important to me. I am so lucky to know wholeheartedly what I want to do in my life. 

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