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It's month four working armed security in Afghanistan, and I find myself working tower guard alone. THANK GOD. Working alone seems to drive everyone else crazy, but I find it serene and peaceful being able to consume my own thoughts, no constant stress of always having a straight face, no bullshit attitude towards literally everyone around me. Why this particular attitude? Because if I don't watch my every single move, or gesture for that matter, I will be eaten up and spit out quickly in this man's world I've volunteered for.
I came to this job after having served six years in the Army National Guard, with three years of full time duty, and one deployment. The last three years of my enlistment I served as a Combat Engineer, which was closed to women until I became one of the first to hold the job since it opened to women in 2015. When people ask why I decided to switch over to being a combat Engineer, it was pretty easy to answer. I would love to blow shit up!! It was the first insight I would have to all of the shenanigans that would come with integrating into a male dominant force, where you're not welcomed most of the time, and seen as snake tainting the long traditions of the only male combat force.
Fast forward to present, I've finished my sixth romantic novel, as it seems to be my own secret place to feel normal, feel womanly emotions, and to forget about all of the pissing contests, and big dick competitions going on since my arrival. Are these men really that pathetic? Yes. If only they saw how pathetic and petty they act, and quit with the bullshit. Just to give you an idea of some of the "badasses" amongst me.... There's the guy who thinks he was bred from a Greek goddess and can make any woman drop her panties at the snap of his fingers. There's the "Greek goddess" hype man that hangs on every work that shithead says, and is the first one to defend the man's honor when someone takes a hit to his ego, like a loyal dog. There's the gossip queen, who is the insecure man, who tries to spread any rumor he can think of for attention out of response to rejection and fear. There's the class clown, who is always trying to come up with the most vile, and inappropriate jokes to get a good laugh audience from his "bros". And then there's me... the rejected female who came from the gates of hell and ruined all of the men's sacred brotherhood in the workforce full of scandalous dick jokes and war stories.
Unfortunately through all of it, I still seem to possess the stubbornness inherited by my father, and continue down this man eat man world for a career as a minority woman. Why? Because I like challenges, I like to push myself, and most importantly, I like to prove people wrong. I tried the safe route, the boring and tedious administrative job. The job where I literally felt a piece of my soul being ripped from my body every day over the course of two years before I finally decided I had had enough.
If only to give some of these men a little insight into all the bullshit I see through... last time I checked, were working the exact same job. We had to meet the same qualifications and requirements to come here, and we're getting paid the same. So, if I want to hear about your "old war stories" and "statistics" on why women shouldn't be doing this kind of work, and how you're "more qualified than me" I'll be sure to let you know, right after I tell you to put your foot up your own ass, you arrogant fuck heads. This is Angel, coming to you live from Afghanistan. Drop mic.....